Harry Johnson The True and Funny Story
by dalucifer
Summary: Harry D. Johnson is the regular high school student.....except he's extremely intelligent, obese, and has never had a girlfriend. His friends has noticed that he's been kind of depressed, so they've been trying to hook up with a lot of girls, trying to ma


**Chapter 1: His name _is _Harry Johnson.**

Harry Johnson. Seventeen years old. Junior in at Southside High School. Intelligent kid. Extremely obese. Never has had a girlfriend. Funny name. Yes, Harry Johnson is a funny name for a weird guy who has blue hair, gray eyes, and his fat hangs out of his t-shirt.

Alright, the story takes place in Harry Johnson's everyday life at school.

"Aww Jesus...first day of school...damn it..." mumbled Harry as he slowly got out of bed and put his school uniform on. Harry hated the uniform, it was all black and he hated gothic kids. Second of all, the shirt was too small, and it was the largest size, and his pants rode up his crotch and butt. "Another terrible year..." And indeed it might be.

A little while later Harry went to the kitchen and took out an apple to eat. His younger brother, nicknamed Small, started teasing him. "You'll need to eat five hunder more apples fatass..." Small started laughing as he fell to the ground, tears flowing out of his eyes. He was laughing really hard as he crawled to the chair, trying to make it before he died of laughter. Harry wasn't gonna let him get away with another fat joke. He ran over to his brother and pushed him into the floor face first, then flipped his body over. Harry paced around Small until Harry was standing over Small's face. He turned around, squated, and pulled down his pants and farted in his brother's face.

"Oh God damn it! I'm gonna die!" screamed Small as he tried to escape for air. Harry sat on his face, yes, sat on his face, and let out another fart and Small was crying for mercy. As soon as Harry pulled up his pants and got off of Small, Small ran over to the trash can and started puking. After a few minutes, Small passed out and layed on the ground.

"I'll get him back even worse," muttered Harry to himself.

He grabbed a sticky note and wrote "I like men" on it and put it on Small's back. Harry quickly picked him up and turned the knob of the back door.

"Mom, we're leaving for school..." moaned Harry as he walked out and closed the door.

"I hope you actually took a shower today..." sighed Mom as she knew Harry didn't hear that.

**--At School--**

"Wake up moron, we're at school..." shouted Harry as mall was still passed out. Harry just threw him on the ground and Small woke up a few minutes later, but Harry was already out of sight.

"Yo Harry, what's up!" yelled Jimbob. Jimbob was the skinny-nerdy type with thick glasses, messy blonde hair, and a pizza face. His parents should have bought him some acne medication... "Did you watch that anime that premiered last night on the Anime-Heaven station?" asked Jimbob.

"Ohh, you mean The Legend of the Mystical Place? Nahh...seemed kind of dumb to me, and I was playing that cool MMORPG called Hell Broke Loose, where you can be a samurai, ninja, thief, mage, or anything you want to be." replied Harry.

"No, not that gay anime about two guys holding hands for twenty-five minutes, I mean Armored Suit Randan Root, an alternate ASR series where there are two factions getting into a war using the Armored Suits, and one faction has a cool ability called 'Root', where they become super powerful..." said Jimbob.

"I guess I'll have to check it out, I remember the original ASR though...good times..." sighed Harry.

"You two anime-loving nerds still come to this school?" asked Rod. Rod was the cool kid of the trio. He was lean, had spiky brown hair, and hated anime. He was more interested in military things than anime.

"You guys should stop watching that cartoon porn..." laughed Rod. Rod, like the average person, thought anime was animated porn because of the Internet.

"We've told you a thousand times, it's not animated porn. And anyways, I'm still surprised you come to this school after what you did last year to that one girl..." replied Jimbob.

"I'll kill you if you say anything about it Jimbob!" screamed Rod as he chased Jimbob.

And school hadn't even started yet, and things still seemed bad for Harry. Hopefully, Harry wouldn't get laughed at during role call like every year...


End file.
